Let’s Talk about Finding New Friends (Day 17)


One of the easiest predictors of success is who you spend the most time with.

While it has been said that you are influenced by the five people you spend the most time with, it may also be said you are the sum of:

  • The five books you last read
  • The five foods you eat the most
  • The five ways you recreate the most
  • The five thoughts you think the most

Ironically, friends can have a major influence on what we read, eat, do for fun, and think about. So choosing friends wisely is important. Sometimes it is important to get a fresh start with who you hang out with.

If you happen to live in the same spot for very long, you likely have made friends based on geography.

Where you live, where you work, and the activities you participate in most are the most common places to make new friends. These friends are made from convenience rather than carefully selected criteria for success and value. Sometime the people you see the most are the ones you end up befriending, which leaves little room or time to cultivate what could be better friends.

Do you need new friends?

If you were to make an assessment of your friendships, would you find them lacking? Are you caught up in activities and behaviours that are holding you back or would cause you to derail off course if you made a fresh start somewhere?

If so, it might be time to consider making new friends.

But how?

Finding new friends may feel impossible or unnecessary. You might think you have no room in your life or desire in your heart to make dramatic changes. After all, feelings are involved as well as social standing, and there could be fallout from making some changes.

Here’s how…

Decide you deserve it

Knowing you deserve and can benefit from better friends will help you look harder for them and weather any storms that come from disengaging from friends who just don’t bring anything to the table.

Redefine your relationships

If you don’t want to end a friendship but need to make room for new friends, simply rearrange the situation.

Kindly and quietly disengage from the friends that don’t suit you and fill your time with valuable activities. You simply won’t have the time in your schedule for the unfulfilling activities.

If you are ready for a fresh start, sometimes that includes friendships. It is important that the people you spend the most time with bring the most value to your table. So, maybe consider choosing new friends and kindly let go or spend less time with those who aren’t helping you to move forwards.

About the Author

I work with business owners and leaders to improve their wellbeing, in these days of overwhelm, whether that be physical, mental or digital, using my POWER to Live More 5 Fundamentals of Simplify, Systemise, Share, Self Care and Sustain. I also work with business leaders to help them to improve their organisational employee engagement and wellbeing. I believe they are interlinked in a lovely virtuous circle.

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